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Soak - Sascha Crawford


Fear moves like water

Fear begins like the ebb before a tsunami

First you feel something

Then

Nothing

Before it CRASHES over you in the coldest

wave that YOU WILL EVER feel the shock will

claw at your neck IT WILL FREEZE YOUR chest

and infect your bones don’t TRY TO BREATHE

YOU CAN’T you’ve already been

Washed away

It drips

It drips

It drips

It drips

From a tap you cannot reach

Your hands are white

Your voice has gone

You are soaked and you are

alone

 

"After over-doing drugs in my teens, specifically one event, I developed PTSD and along with that came anxiety and depersonalisation. I never understood what a panic attack was before this, but I immediately recognized the purest feeling of fear itself when it hit me. Raw fear is like no emotion I had ever felt before. It's not cathartic like anger or sadness. The words "I'm scared" never used to hold any weight to me. My poem is about the physical feeling (or the tell-tale sign) of fear. That first ice-cold drop I feel in every bones, every time."


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