I hate you
I hate the life you think you live
I hate that you won’t stand up for yourself. Why?
I hate that you allow yourself to be unhappy. Why?
I hate that you’re angry all the time and have no way to let it out
I hate that you constantly damage your happiness
I hate that I love you
I hate that you’re felt misunderstood
I hate that you don’t want to feel
I hate that you won’t heal
I hate that your pain is useless
I hate that you do nothing yet feel everything
I hate you hating me
I hate that I love you
I hate that you can’t say it
I hate that you can’t show it
I hate that you can’t scream it, or punch it, or drink it, or ignore it
It’s there, it’s me , I hate me hating me because it’s hard to be me, to feel me, to know me, to read me
I am a challenge for me
So I’m gonna love me for me.
Crazy?
“This piece was influenced by an argument in which my boyfriend told me "sometimes I want to push you harder because I know you can do better but I dont". It created a 'shitstorm' in my brain. I cried myself to bed that night because little did he know of the Goliath within me that pushes and pushes and pushes myself so hard yet I come up feeling lost. I know that I love myself enough not to commit suicide, but I hate that I feel everything around me in a way that it hurts and prevents me from wanting to live. And its difficult to express of explain when everyone expects to much from you.”
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